And here I thought we were in a recession...

The spending bill which passed last week includes an emergency supplemental appropriations bill covering:

· $660 million to Gaza
· $555 million to Israel
· $310 million to Egypt
· $300 million to Jordan
· $420 million to Mexico
· $889 million to the United Nations for so-called “peace-keeping” missions
· $1 billion overseas to address the global financial crisis outside U.S. borders
· $8 billion to address a potential pandemic flu
· $108 billion loan guarantee to the IMF (International Monetary Fund)

Does anyone know where this money is coming from? Does anyone care? I understand some of this money is helping to fight wars overseas and some will be used to help the financial crisis overseas. But I need a fax machine. And I need new walking shoes. Could use a new pair of jeans. I can't afford them because I'm laid off, saving my money to move back to WI in July and am in my own financial crisis.

Why should our government be any different than you or I?

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Congratulations, Catherine! You're headed to Broadway, Baby!

(photo by Alisabeth)

Very exciting news. (Ms.) Catherine Blades, whom I've known since she was 2, is headed to Broadway this fall to perform in the revival of "Bye, Bye Birdie", starring John Stamos and Gina Gershon.

I've performed with (Ms.) Blades' mother, Amy (medalist in the World Figure Skating Championships), in numerous theatrical gigs in Cedar Rapids, IA. (Ms.) Blades' credits include: "Fiddler", "Urinetown", "Peter Pan", "The Wizard of Oz" and Follies (in Iowa). She also did "Blood Brothers" (which she loved, as I do, even though the rest of the world has no taste - unless you've done BB) and "Merrily We Roll Along" at Wingspan Arts Conservatory in New York and she was Amaryllis in the national tour of "The Music Man".

She'll be understudying the role of "Kim MacAfee" and will also be in the ensemble. (Ms.)...oh, whatever. She ain't too big for me! CATHERINE'S!! really one of the rare performers - a natural. I've always said (I did!) that she's a wonderfully, talented girl and that she'd go far. Well...it's Broadway folks!

(photo by Lauren Lamb)

Catherine (2nd from the bottom of the pile) with her friends in Iowa - doing what friends in Iowa do. Break a leg, Catherine! I'll be rooting for you!

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Separated at Birth? Joe Walsh and Crazy Solstice Air Guitar Dude.

The crazy air guitar dude is....um...oh, the one on the bottom, yes, at the post-Solstice parade party in Santa Barbara.

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What a tangled web we weave...

A spider in Goleta. Bastard was about a foot above my head at Tom Nowak's house when Tom pointed IT out to me. I don't like spiders hanging a foot over my head.

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A few Solstice honeys.

Oops...how did Greg Nowak get in there? Sorry. Children - turn away.

Even though this picture of me and my Aunt Ev (dad's youngest sister) was taken the day before the parade, I wanted to include her in my Solstice Honey post 'cause she bitched at me last year as all the "honey's" were blondes. And after all, my Aunt Ev is the best Solstice Honey out there!

Check out my 2007 Solstice Babe post and the story behind the lame Solstice beer garden from last year. Newsflash! The beer garden is still fucked up. Same pathetic layout (the size of my right nut) AND - get this - they were charging a $5 cover to get in. BULLSHIT! I say to the beautiful city of Santa Barbara. We boycotted the garden this year - which is why I limited in my shots of Solstice Honeys this year.

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Santa Barbara Solstice Parade!

This was my 4th or 5th Solstice. Was sorry that my brother, Jas, couldn't make it (fishing in Canada). Always a good time. Colorful floats. Colorful dancers. And the people of Santa Barbara embrace the spirit of the day that's fun to watch. Click on READ MORE! and enjoy the parade.

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Greg getting into the Solstice spirit before the parade starts.

Don't know these folks but they looked the part so I shot them.

An errant Solstice bubble landed on my leg and remained there for a good hour.

Alien pod crossing.

Tom (far right) getting into it after the parade at Alameda Park. Quite primal, I must say. Old and young alike got into the action. Course, there wasn't 500 naked bicyclists like there were in the Seattle Solstice parade...but we had fun nevertheless.

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Watch & Listen...Solstice 2009

Here's a little taste of Solstice in Santa Barbara.



Stay tuned for more pictures/posts on Solstice 2009 and for the continuing series, "Grace Notes from a Bohemian in Wanderlust" - my travels back to the Midwest this past May.

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Olivia Munn is back!

I had never heard of Olivia Munn until I saw her in GQ in April 2008.

Lucky for me I got a double-shot of her this month. Here she is below in the first ever double month issue of Playboy (July/August). That's it for her pictorial - no nudity. Sorry about the folds - I couldn't find this shot online so I just snapped it from the magazine.

Then she appears in Men's Health magazine (below) where she enlightens us about what her bedroom looks like - and what guys' bedrooms should look like.

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Happy 67th Birthday, Brian Wilson! Late.

This WAS scheduled to post at 6/20/09 at 4 am...on Brian's b-day. It didn't. Thanks Blogger....your bad.

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"Pass the Salt, Please." is the "AWESOMEST"; heads to Fort Lauderdale.

I never went on Spring Break in college. Never got to go to Fort Lauderdale. But my play is.

After a successful four-week run at the Adrienne Arsht Center in Miami (which I attended - search blog topics under City Theatre Summer Shorts Festival) my "dirty little play" heads to Fort Lauderdale for one week. One of my biggest cheerleaders, Brandon Thorp of the Miami New Times, gave "PTSP." a very nice review when it opened in Miami a month ago. He ran another article recently to remind people about the Fort Lauderdale engagement:

Thanks, Brandon. "Pass the Salt, Please." and the rest of City Theatre's Summer Shorts Festival 2009 moves to the Broward Center for the Performing Arts in Fort Lauderdale this weekend to close the festival.

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Santa Barbara Solstice update!

Tom and I enjoying the Solstice festivities before the parade at Noon today. Greg's taking the picture. Why is my shirt making me look fat? Look for my full Solstice post soon!

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Santa Barbara walk.

5-mile morning walk along the Pacific in Santa Barbara. Left to right: me, Aunt Ev, Uncle Bob Nowak, Bev Schmidt (Nowak), Tom Nowak and Greg Nowak provided this lovely shot from his phone. Whoa! Watch out for those sea cucumbers!

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The Business of Being Favre.

Interest is high in Vikings-Packers game
By Don Walker of the Journal Sentinel
Jun. 19, 2009 7:46 a.m.

The prospect of Brett Favre as the quarterback of the Minnesota Vikings has certainly generated more interest than normal for the two Green Bay Packers-Minnesota Vikings games this coming season.

StubHub, a major secondary ticket provider in the country, reports that the Nov. 1 game between the teams at Lambeau Field is already the second highest-grossing game of the upcoming season. It trails only the season opener against the Chicago Bears.

That Nov. 1 game is also fetching the highest average ticket-selling price for all of the Packers' homes games. The average price is $267.

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TGIF! Friday presents...Electrocute's "Just Like I Am".

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Hey Artie? It's now 101.

Comedian Artie Lange said the other night on Joe Buck Live (HBO) that there are 100 sites on the Internet betting on when he'll die. Make that 101.

Lange's behavior on Joe Buck Live was inexcusable...unless you're a fat, disgusting, pig like Lange. I mean, honestly...this asshole has not one attractive character trait. Lange talked of being homophobic (don't worry, a gay man will not hit on you, Artie) and he made gay jokes about Joe Buck (like what woman in her right mind would date this pig?).

Think I'm overreacting? He got banned from ever doing HBO again - EVER. Certainly HBO knew what it was in for when agreeing to have Lange on the show so HBO isn't without fault. Did you watch it? I watched it. I'm no prude and I have a sense of humor but his schtick (or shit) had no place on the show - it didn't fit. Had nothing to do with anything. If he's doing stand-up somewhere and the moment is all about him, fine. But he's a guest on a show. He didn't give a shit about anything or anyone - just his own fat, pig self agenda. And Paul Rudd is just as much of a dick because he clapped along with the audience at Lange's disgusting homophobic jokes. Nice one, Paul. You could've just not clapped and said something like, "whoaaaa, now we've crossed the line, buddy." Will the real Paul Rudd kindly step forward? I'm sure all your gay friends in the entertainment field are proud of you.

Artie, there's a reason you're playing 3rd fiddle to Howard Stern and his sidekick, Robin. You're act is HACK. Anyone who has an interest in comedy could do that. Do the world a favor - go out on bender, throw in a little heroin and just die, OK? You'll make 101 websites/blogs very happy.

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Happy 67th Birthday, Sir Paul McCarthy!

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Baby Gwyneth's baptism pictures just in!

Pictures! Just what you wanted to hear (and see). And a slew of them. So if you're interested in seeing me during a very proud moment - being official recognized as Gwyneth McCann Glover's godfather (or "Nino"), click on READ MORE! If not, then I will pray for your wretched soul. Ha. Really, it'll be fun - see if you can find the peacock!

I know. You're sick of hearing me go on and on about how I'm a godfather now and how in the Mexican culture my title is "Nino Jeff". What can I say? For those of you who unexplicably missed my earlier posts regarding this blessed event: the offer is made, the pre-baptism announcement and the official hand-in-hand picture of goddaughter and godfather.

Me, Nina Monica (the godmother) and Gwyneth. Gwyneth is wearing her traditional baptismal dress that Donovan's (the father) stepmother made.

The actual baptism with Maria and Donovan (parents).

And the parents, Gwyneth and Grace, who'll be 2 in two weeks.

Maria's parents. For those of you who've missed previous posts on me being given the title, "Nino" (godfather), Maria's mother is Mexican and her father is Irish. That enough for you?

Parents and godparents at Maria's parent's home in Arcadia for the post-baptism shindig.

That's Susie (far left) and Jay (far right), Grace's godparents. Good people. Theoretically, the title of "Nino" and "Nina" (godfather and godmother) extend to both children.

There's the peacock! Interesting story. Wayyyy back in the late 1800's, one of the early settlers of Arcadia (near Pasadena) had peacocks running around his property (which was most of Arcadia). The ancestors of the original peacocks are free to roam around the town, the streets, people's backyards and trees, protected by the city. This proud bird ran from Maria's parent's yard across the street. Loud motherfuckers.

And last but not least, one more picture of the party girl herself, my goddaughter...Gwyneth. I'm gonna be a great "Nino", no?

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"Get a grip...and a life, Michael Hunt!"

Michael Hunt is a sports columnist for the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel - my hometown newspaper. An article appeared in today's paper (thanks for the head's up, mom!) written by Mr. Hunt - "Favre taking us on a ride - again".

My response to Mr. Hunt and Letters to the Editor is as follows:


Why is the nature of journalists (and fans) to feel the need to SPEAK FOR ME and the way I FEEL about Brett Favre? Here's another great example: Michael Hunt's article in yesterday's paper, "Favre taking us on a ride - again" (MJS June 17, 2009). As Mr. Hunt's column is a personal opinion column, I would prefer his headline read: "Favre taking ME on a ride - again". You see, Brett Favre is not taking Jeff Ircink on any ride. He never has - except perhaps the "ride" of watching him play every Sunday (and that includes last season as I boycotted the Pack in favor of the Jets). Whatever Brett plans to do - unretire or stay retired - makes no difference to me. It doesn't affect my life like it obviously affects thousands of you who scream and moan that "Favre did this" and "Brett's doing that" or "oh it's that time of year again...will he or won't he?". It's his decision. The media and fans are constantly throwing phrases around like "his image is tarnished", "once he was a legend" or "my hero has fallen". You know what...that's YOUR problem - not Brett's. Or mine. Here's my phrase for all of you: "Get a a grip - and a life."

Jeff Ircink
Los Angeles (and WI native)

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Solstice 2009! Santa Barbara!

Headed back to SB tomorrow morning through the weekend for Solstice - Santa Barbara's answer to Mardi Gras. There's still some relation in town from last week's graduation so it'll be nice to sit back with a drink and partake in this annual tradition.

For a past look at previous Solstice's (Solsti?): 2008 Solstice, beer garden clusterfuck at 2008 Solstice, and Girls of 2007 Solstice. Happy Alban Heruin!

It's Druid...or Wicca. Something anti-Christian, I'm sure.

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A nice compliment from a member of The Dramatists Guild of America.

"What I love about your work in this play, Jeff, is the fun, sexy, funny and ultimately very poignant writing. Congratulations, Jeff. Well done."

– Gary Garrison, playwright, author, exec. director for Creative Affairs of The Dramatists Guild of America, artistic dir. and division head of playwriting for the Goldberg Department of Dramatic Writing at the Tisch School of the Arts, New York, on the performance of my short play, "Pass the Salt, Please.", at the Summer Shorts Festival in Miami, May-June 2009.

(thanks, gary. that is a tremendous thing to say, especially coming from someone with your rep.)

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Brett Favre labeled "slimeball" by FoxSports Kriegel while DUI murderers, druggies, thieves, dog killers, gun-toters run amok in the pros.

Brett Favre appeared on the premiere of HBO's Joe Buck Live last night to discuss his NFL future. Nothing was said that hadn't been hashed and rehashed by the media already. What was important was that IT was STATED BY FAVRE.

Now, during a very full news day in sports, the following stories made headlines:

1) Wide receiver Donte Stallworth gets sentenced for DUI manslaughter (that's a story in and of itself;
2) A report issued today confirms that Sammy Sosa tested positive for performance enhancing drugs in 2003;
3) An arrest warrant is issued for NFL dud ex-QB Ryan Leaf for drugs and theft;
4) Plaxico Burress gun trial delayed until September, and finally,
5) Arizona Cardinals' tight end Ben Patrick was suspended for four games for violating the NFL's substance abuse policy

But no - FAVRE is the "slimeball". (I didn't mention recent news - well I did now - of Michael "Dog Killer" Vick's release from jail and his future with the NFL (Atlanta did, in fact, wash its hands of him).

Nope. Mark "Bonaduce"/"douchebag" Kriegel of FoxSports.com writes an article stating Brett Favre is a "slimeball" for contemplating coming out of retirement to play for the Minnesota Vikings. Interesting.

If you read this blog, search MARK KRIEGEL - there is no love loss between he and I. And if you read Kriegel's article, you'll see that 90%+ of the comments rip Kriegel a new asshole. Which is disturbing to me...that FoxSports.com continues to allow Kriegel to write articles on Brett Favre when dead people know Kriegel is not a fan of Favre's (nor is Kriegel the least bit objective about Favre).

I could go on and on about this dipshit but I won't. Read the article. Here's the transcript of what Brett said on Joe Buck Live on HBO yesterday. Unfortunately, I can't post the video from the show because HBO will have my ass in a sling. Figure it out for yourself.

Here's my one bone of contention: the media accuses Favre of waffling about retirement. So tell me, FoxSports.com and Mark Kriegel, why are you constantly changing your headlines and the verbage in your links throughout the day? This has happened before. I mean, if you stand by your story and your journalistic integrity (however much integrity you think you have), why are you constantly backtracking? To save face? Because your original adjectives crossed the line? What other reasons could there be? Here are some examples:

Front page of MSN.com: KRIEGEL: Favre just another celeb slimeball.

The "celeb slimeball" remained up all day, then the article mention was removed completely. Now before I could copy the headline to the actual article (the one from above), it was changed to read this:

The newsbox below is not on the MSN.com front page but on the football page where Kriegel's article appears. Notice - they removed "slimeball" from Kriegel's headline but not "slimy celeb" from this box:

Later in the day, FoxSports.com removed "slimy celeb" and added just "typical". Which makes no sense - how does that give me any insight into what the article "typical" is about (the one above that - "Favre says..." - is a different article...more newsy and not commentary from an asshole)?

Another thing - if Favre's behavior is "typical", why then is it news? If something's "typical", it's not newsworthy, right? Or it's a less-than-desired news tidbit. Also - above Kriegel's article - is a banner highlighting a bunch of sports stories. This one call's Favre an "out-of-touch celebuskank":

Oops! FoxSports.com must have thought they crossed the line and later changed the text to read, "celebrity diva" instead of "celebuskank":

Confusing, isn't it? Annoying even. Join the club. My point is why put "slimeball", "slimy" and "celebuskank" in your article if you're just gonna change them anyway? If you're doing it to attract attention to yourself, it's working. FoxSports.com is the National Enquirer of the Internet. Yeahhhh. But then why do you retract those adjectives? Obviously your credibility is lost when you write one thing then say another. I mean, isn't that the reason why you (FoxSports.com) and the rest of the media get on Favre's case - about changing his mind, waffling, making believe he's the good ole boy when he's really not, saying he's dumb but then saying he knows what he's doing all along? See - now you've got me confused.

Shut the fuck up. For once...just shut the fuck up.

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