I'm gonna kill Shelley Edlin! My FarmTown addiction.

Above: My "avatar" - Jeffrey James. My farm is named after my dad's R&R trio from the late 50's, early 60's, the Glenn Mar Trio (wait - that name doesn't even make sense...it should be Glenn Mar Farms; I'm an idiot). I fashioned by avatar with a blue mohawk because it stands out while I'm in the middle of the marketplace trying to get hired by some other farmer. It's chaos...I can't even explain it.

If you're not aware (or your dead), Farmtown is a game where you and your friends design, grow and maintain your own farm. It's quite intense, complicated, realistic and addicting. There are currently over 11,948,808 monthly active users and I have 17 friends that partake. Many of the players I interact with I have never met.

My high school friend Shelley emailed me and said, "hey, you should do this...there are some people from home on it and it would be fun!". Now I desperately want to kill her! What's interesting is that you not only "farm" your own farm, but you can hire out to other farms and harvest and plow their acreage. By doing so, the farm owner makes more money and the worker makes money - and both parties accrue experience points so you move up the ladder and can aquire additional seeds, buildings, animals and more property to farm. Do you even care? Thought not. Silly muggles.

Above: One stage of Del Mar Farms on Facebook's Farmtown. It's changed since then

How does this affect my life - or anyone else's? It doesn't. It's a stupid game and it's wasting all our time. But it's addicting and competitive as hell and, if nothing else, it's helping me to communicate with people I already know. I could regale you with all sorts of Farmtown stories but you wouldn't understand or care unless you play the game. If only my father knew his 44-year-old son is addicted to this. He'd have me committed.

Look for my series, "The Further Adventures of Jeffrey James Avatar in FarmTown" , here and on Facebook. It's a hoot. At least I think it's a hoot. Alright, gotta get back to Del Mar Farms - I should say "Glenn Mar Farms" now - my coffee is ripening.