8,500 reasons to "Oink, oink". Obama approves $410 billion spending bill.

I won't get into a debate on whether or not President Obama should or shouldn't have approved this bill WITH its 8,500 earmarks ("pork", "bullshit"). I wanna discuss some of the specific earmarks for a minute...just to show you what a bunch of dumb asses we've got representing "our" interests in Washington.

A solar highway in Oregon? A pleasure taxi service in Connecticut? What about that Mormon cricket control in Utah? The study of pig odor?

According to the Western Regional Climate Center, Eugene, OR has 75 clear days, Portland has 68 and Salem has 77. So good luck with your solar fucking highway. Mormon cricket control? Buy a can of Raid and/or listen to the crickets...their chirping can be pleasant. The $1.7 million to study pig odor in Iowa? I lived in Cedar Rapids for 5 1/2 years. Can't be anything worse than the smell of Quaker Oats downtown. And by the way - pig odor smells like...shit. Moving on, the taxi service I found, courtesy of the Connecticut Post, is Congressman Jim Himes' (D), effort to provide access to waterfront for children of the poorest neighborhood in Connecticut's poorest city. The bridge that linked the beach to Bridgeport and Stratford burned down in 2006 and it would cost around $30 million to repair or replace. So what? Take a plastic pool and fill it up with water. Run through a sprinkler. It's what my brother and I did when we couldn't make it to a nearby lake. Asshole.

Senator Dianne Feinstein (D), California, stated, “I want to help my state, otherwise why do I come here?” Not sure what Feinstein earmarked (I'm sure she did), but she needs to just shut the fuck up. First of all, that's a stupid comment. Secondly, are Connecticut's constituents in favor of Himes' pleasure water ride proposal? Were they even asked? Same could be said for most of the pork your elected officials have proposed to "help" your state. These expenditures would be questioned if our economy was on a rebound, for Christ's sake.

(My personal earmark's for the next year: Change my current living arrangements, get my WC check from Fireman's fund, get out of CA and have one of my full-length plays produced. Will the federal government do anything to help me get MY pork?)