If Annie Oakely wrote a Match.com ad.

This dating site popped up on my laptop suddenly, featuring this woman's profile. I read through it (the woman was 36 but looked 46 and 100% not my type). I immediately thought of Annie Oakley and said to myself, "if Annie Oakley were on Match.com (for example) THIS is what she'd write". Word for word, this is what a woman from Cumberland (northwest part of the state, nearer the MN border), Wisconsin wrote:

I AM 5FT, BLUE EYES, AUBURN HAIR, 140LBS., AND A DOUBLE D CHEST. LOVE OUTDOORS AND TO HAVE FUN. I LIKE TRUCK PULLS, MUD BOGGING, ATVING, CASINOS, FISHING, GOLFING, BOWLING AND STUFF LIKE THAT. I WAS A TRUCK DRIVER AND EVERYONE TELLS ME THAT IS WHERE I BELONG CUZ THAT IS WHERE I AM HAPPY. WANT A GOOD MAN TO SHARE MY LIFE AND FUN. I HATE LIARS, CHEATERS, AND THIEVES. I JUST GOT RID OF A BOTTOM FEEDER LIKE THAT AND WILL NOT PUT UP WITH ANOTHER ONE. I AM VERY HONEST AND OUTSPOKEN ALSO. WANT TO KNOW MORE JUST ASK.

Looking for: LOOKING FOR A GOOD MAN WITH A NICE PACKAGE AND KNOWS HOW TO TREAT A WOMAN.
For those of you who don't know, Annie Oakley was an American sharpshooter and exhibition shooter. This led to a starring role in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show, which propelled her to become the first American female superstar. This year is her 150th birthday. Incidentally, Oakley was 5 foot, had brown hair and, though her eye color is not known, one "expert" thinks they may have been blue, as Annie was a Quaker (whatever that means).

And Oakley was much prettier than the woman from Cumberland, Wisconsin.