Birds.

We've noticed an inordinate number of robins hanging around the cemetery. And they're hanging out in groups - 5, 6 or 7 at a time. And they're pretty brazen - not venturing too far away from us.

There are approximately 15 billion living birds in the United States at any single moment. There are 313, 292, 591 people in the US (as of this moment).

If every single person living in the US went outside at the same time and all those birds woke up on the wrong side of the nest and decided to attack us – that’s 48 birds per person. They would peck the shit out of us.

Have a nice walk in the park.